Daniel Harkavy wrote,
“At your funeral, someone from your family — perhaps even a few friends — will offer a eulogy, a ‘good word’ about your life. At the reception afterward, the words will continue. What would those closest to you remember about your life? What stories will they tell? How would they summarize what your life means to them?
“Our days add up to a lifetime—a legacy. How will others assess your legacy? The bad news is that once you’re gone, you won’t have any control over it. The good news is there’s still time. The future is full of possibilities. You can still influence the conversation that will happen once you’re gone. You can shape them by the choices you make from this time forward.”
—From the book Living Forward, p. 60 (emphasis added)
It’s an interesting thought, what will you be known for after you’re gone?
I’ve been to a fair amount of funerals lately and have learned that no one’s life is summed up in one single or simple way. Your life is multi-faceted. You have many branches that make up the tree that is your life. In part, that’s what this Flourish First Life Coaching is about, recognizing and using those various areas to build the life you want.
Some of those areas are:
- Relationships (family, friends, community)
- Spirituality
- Work
- Intellect
- Fun & Social Life
- Health & Fitness
- etc.
Imagine you could decide now what would be said about you at your funeral in each area of your life, not because you tell people how to think of you, but because you decide today how you want to be remembered. Writing your own obituary is a powerful tool in deciding how you want to live your life. If that’s too morbid for you, think of it as a mission statement. Consider each area of you life, and write a sentence describing your best self in that area. String those statements together and you’ve got yourself your ideal obituary (I mean a holistic personal mission statement).
This might seem uncomfortable to you, but this isn’t at all about death. Not if you really think about it. This is about life. Your life. The ways you want to be remembered and appreciated in each aspect of your life should dictate how you live out that part of your life. If you craft legacy statements for each of your life areas, it should help you catch the vision of who you really want to be.
“Leaving a legacy is inevitable, leaving the one that you want is not.”
— Daniel Harkavy, Living Forward p. 66
Steps to Figure Out Your Legacy
- Decide which areas of life matter most to you.
- Family
- Love/Commitment
- Career/work
- Education
- Spirituality
- Community
- Friends
- Finances
- Write a legacy statement that you think those closest to you would say about you in each area as if you were to die today. Not what you hope they would say, but what you really think they would say.
- Sit back or go for a walk and really think. What do you actually want for each area of your life? How do you want to be remembered?
- Write a legacy statement for each area of your life as if you will live the exact life you’d want to live and died at the exact age you’d want to die at.
- Look at those two sets of legacy statements. And here’s the real question, the one that matters most: What do you have to do to bridge the gap?
Legacy Statement Examples:
Relationships:
- She treated her family like friends and her friends like family.
Community:
- She always made the time to help those she loved when they were in need.
Career/Work:
- She was honest in her work, always wanting to do the best she could do.
Spirituality:
- She was deeply dedicated to living the life God would have her live.
Spirituality/Self-improvement:
- She was always trying to improve, love others more purely, and know and act on the teachings of the Savior.
Self-Improvement:
- She worked hard on her mind and heart, always humble and willing to change.
Health & Fitness/Relationships
- She focused on being healthy so that she could spend more quality time with family and friends.
Fun & Social Life:
- She was always laughing and making others laugh. She knew how to make the heavy light and the light hilarious.